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Drug and alcohol abuse don't just affect the abuser; they affect everyone else in that person's life as well. Friends and relatives are often surprised to find that the frustrations they encounter are actually pretty universal. It is helpful for those who are "codependent" to meet with others facing the same issues to get emotional support and practical advice, to learn what they can do to help their loved ones. It's also important to learn to accept the fact that it is not under their control when the abuser is not ready to get clean.